I was once walking in Washington Square Park in New York City when I came across a girl sitting by the fountain. She looked like a regular girl, with brown hair, tan skin, and bright eyes.
Beside her she had a sign that said “Free Advice”. As she sat there, strangers came up to her and shared with her their problems. Through the conversation between this girl and the stranger, the stranger would somehow be uplifted and changed. The stranger would look happier, lighter, and more at ease.
I was inspired.
I was amazed at how a single person could make a difference simply by putting herself out there. I was amazed at how a single conversation could actually make an impact.
I longed to be like her. I wished I had the courage to sit in public with a large sign, alone, not caring what anybody thought about me. I wished I had the conviction to offer myself up to people, in all my imperfections, letting them know that I was there for them and that I wanted to make a difference.
In reality I was so far from who she was. She was a counselor giving free advice to others. I was a banker brokering financial transactions between corporations and the public.
Still, that dream was etched into my being.
After leaving my banking job, I came back to Singapore. I made my own sign that said ‘Free Conversations’ (I didn’t dare to offer free advice as I was not a trained anything) and sat outside the National Orchid Garden. People came up to me and I had nice chats with them. I wasn’t making the difference I wanted to make, but I was now able to connect to strangers without much fear.
I had taken one tiny step towards my dream.
One year later, I had begun training as a life coach and was actively volunteering in a community of coaches. We wondered how we could touch and inspire more lives. One day, during a management meeting, I had the “Free Advice Girl” website open in my browser. The master coach of the organisation saw the site, and said that he would not mind coaching people in the streets! Another manager chimed in, saying that instead of street magic a la David Blaine, we would have street coaching!
So we hatched a grand plan to coach people for 7 days consecutively, from 9am to 5pm every day. We would sit out in the grass patch at Raffles Place to coach busy executives, housewives, retirees, students, and everyone in between.
The outreach was a success! We had coached 135 people over one week, and had even been featured in a national newspaper. All coaching slots were booked up.
Emboldened, we decided that we would make the campaign bigger. We named ourselves Dream Singapore. We would not only create a 30-day campaign, we would set a world record.
We gathered a bunch of volunteers. I sent out emails to companies, charitable organisations, banks, small businesses, asking for support. In the emails I detailed our vision to make a difference.
All this time we had no resources yet. We had nothing but a crazy dream.
To my surprise, four corporations pledged their support! They said we could coach in their offices. Now we had a home – we would not be roaming the streets like the previous year, getting chased out of coffee shops for staying too long.
Over 30 days, we had coached 535 people, and set both national and international records for most people coached in consecutive days. The campaign was so successful that even the Prime Minister offered financial support from the National Youth Council.
From a single person trying to make a difference, to a national campaign that rallied a group of 20 volunteers, 4 corporate partners, and touched 535 lives.
If Free Advice Girl did not have the courage to sit out there alone trying to make a difference, if I had not acted on my inspiration to bring this dream to Singapore, none of this would have happened.
When I took that first step and made my ‘Free Conversations’ sign, I did not know how all this would unfold. I took that step anyway, because I had to. Because something deep inside me knew that with courage and perseverance, I could make a difference.
When we take a tiny step in the direction of our dreams, we are paving the way for a much grander vision to unfold.
People often want plans and certainty. They want to know that things are all going to work out, even if they quit their jobs, even if they take a risk with their careers and their lives.
The honest truth is that there is no such thing as certainty when you walk the path of your dreams. All you can do is trust in yourself and have faith that things will eventually work out.
Six years ago, I was feeling lost in life. I had just left my banking job and I did not know what I would do next. However, I did have a dream that I would one day be able to make a living as a coach.
I wrote that dream down on a piece of paper, with no clue as to how it would happen.
The coach training school told me that it was difficult for people to make a living as a coach, that most practitioners had full-time jobs while they coached on the side. I knew the reality. The odds were against me.
I took on a full-time job to support myself while I improved my skills in coaching. I took many personal development programs at the same time to grow myself as a person. Those years were tough. I had to juggle a full-time job, work at my coaching skills, and work on myself as a person. I invested wholeheartedly in my own growth. I would coach people during lunch and after work. I would coach people on weekends.
One day I realised that I was ready. I took the leap and left my job to be a coach full time, and to pursue work that inspires and fulfils me. Today I can honestly say that I love what I do. I love my work. There is no other role or job I would rather be than a coach and trainer.
When I first left my banking job, I did not anticipate that this day would happen. I simply took a leap of faith. The road to where I am now was difficult and full of hard work. I lost relationships, friendships, safety, and comfort along the way. I also gained partners, companions, comrades, adventure, inspiration, passion, and love.
If I had to choose all over again, I would make the exact same choice.
Sometimes I look back and wonder how exactly I got here. Was it really such a surprise, something so unexpected?
I recall that when I was five, I had already loved teaching. I would gather all my plush toys and my two-year-old brother, create a classroom, and start teaching them. I recall that when I was 17, I sought out and mentored a 12-year-old girl. I recall that when I was 18, I went to Laos to teach children.
My calling had already revealed itself to me when I was a child. I had always been telling myself, through my deepest dreams and desires, what I wanted to be. Even five-year-old me knew how my life would turn out.
Perhaps you are lost on the journey of discovering yourself, perhaps you are not sure what your ideal job is or how to find meaning in life and work. I want to assure you that no matter where you are, no matter how lost you feel, there is an answer within you. The lostness and desperation are all part of a larger journey that will unfold and bring you clarity in the future, if only you trust the process.
Some days I feel as lost as I did the day I left my banking job. In the process of actively creating a life, I have learned that growth is a process of deconstruction and reconstruction. There will be days of lostness, falling apart, disintegration. But that is all serving to build a stronger you.
If you follow your dream to the end of the road,
The Seekers
Taking care not to let it fade away,
If you follow your dream and you follow it well,
It will lead you to the promise of a bright, shiny day.
Take each step with faith, in the direction of love.
Step by step, you will get there.
The beauty of an uncharted path lies in its pure potential.
